Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize