I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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