false alarm. still invincible.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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