this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
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