Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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