And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize