if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Randomize