so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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