my mouth tastes like poor choices
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
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