shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
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