i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I could make wine with my vomit
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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