dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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