So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
So many bounce houses so little time
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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