Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Randomize