I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
you made out with another girl for some wings
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
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