Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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