He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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