Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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