I CAN MOONWALK!
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
And the cops told us we were all naked.
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So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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