piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Its about making memories worth repressing
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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