u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize