It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize