i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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