i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
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