he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
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