I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Randomize