I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come back. Shots need mouths.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Come on in and take your pants off
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