im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize