I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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