I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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