i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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