I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
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