Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Randomize