Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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