So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize