but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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