I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
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we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
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This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
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