What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
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