im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
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woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
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