did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
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