For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Randomize