What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize