she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
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