my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize