i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
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