Since when is my name a synonym for head?
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize