Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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