Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
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Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
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He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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