hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize