I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize